I’m always open to life lessons taught to me through Nature. During a beautiful Summer morning, I turned away from my fear of seizing alone with nothing soft to fall against, in case of unpredictable seizure, and began enjoying a new habit, a routine of walking in my neighborhood. This new morning constitutional is important to me for many reasons:
• I had recently released the bondage of false belief that I could not develop a habit because of the diagnosis my brain and body carry
• I was working toward better overall health and fitness
• I liked the feeling I had during and after every session of walking
While immersed in the beauty of nature during the morning walk, a memory from earlier the same morning came to me. The memory was of my inner guidance whispering to me as I woke, encouraging me to be easy with myself on this day and, perhaps, forego my morning walk. I excused the whispers as taunts keeping me from success and I took action in my plan for the morning.
I am learning every day to discern the whispers in my mind. Which whisper is ego-based? Which whisper is one that will empower my journey toward success? I step forward with Faith as I fine-tune my actions to balance with the messages I receive and listen with open spiritual ears for the manifestation, or answers, in my life. This day was to be a day of honing this skill of inner work.
Although the still inner voice inside of me told me to refrain from exercise on this day, I turned away and chose to fall under the influence of the ego and enjoy the late morning walk. The walk was short and easy, the day was manageable in temperature and humidity. During the walk, I felt as if I made the better decision for me this day.
On my return, I felt Jesyka’s presence as I often do in times of distress when I most need an extra lift of comfort. Her presence was confirmed by half a dozen yellow butterflies fluttering around me, following me the entire way home. The experience was joyful for me. I had not connected this experience with an underlying message until hours later…
During an evening conversation with friends, I was discussing the experience of my walk earlier this day, seizures that occurred later in the day, and suddenly I made the connection of the spiritual message sent via butterflies. I had strayed from my promise to put my energy, my self-love, and God first in my every day. On this day, I made the decision to put my ego first. The ego that wanted to succeed at something. The ego that measured my value in the action I took earlier on this day. As a result, a consequence, three seizures interrupted a seizure-free month and began a new cycle of healing for me. Did I consider this punishment? No. Some may teach that it was punishment by using the word – Should or Should not – telling me I should have stayed home. Well, I released the “S” word from my vocabulary long ago as it serves good to no one.
What might be learned from my experience? Cultivate a listening ear for yourself. This requires you take time to be still and know the voice of your Creator. This takes practice, so be easy with yourself. Begin small, general, and practical. Then, as your belief builds you will notice your listening ear awakening to your Creators’ voice. Remember, along with your Creators’ voice is your own or the voice of Ego. This is where you begin to practice honing your craft of discerning one from another.
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